Somehow I got thru today. Did not accomplish a thing. My brother Chuck passed away April 14, 2014 so that 's coming up soon. Missing him terribly. So glad he's no longer in pain and know he is on to the next stage of the Great Adventure!
The morning he died I had called at 5am (In Chicago) to see how his night was. I had spent 5 or 8 days with him in the hospital sleeping in the same room and it was wonderful although he had so much energy I had to plead for time to sleep. We had so many good talks as always. Not to say we didn't hang up on each other occasionally over the years, but we both knew how to admit when we were wrong and apologized. That morning, the nurse told me he would probably pass that day which was Easter Sunday. I asked if she would hold the phone to his ear. He was sleeping and also on morphine at that time. So I got a chance to say goodbye and tell him how much I loved him. Then hung up the phone, went back on the couch, and just crouched there. I had had to return to NYC for a freelance project and I will always regret not staying until the end with him. At 9am I was sobbing on the couch. Then suddenly felt someone tap me on the head and heard his joking around voice say, "I thought I told you to be happy!" And then he was gone. So wonderful that he stopped by to say not good bye but to remind me to be happy. So like him. Such a good man. Not perfect no. But who is. Just before this happened I had looked at the clock wondering if it would be ok to call the nurses again to get an update. I knew how busy they were in hospice. So I knew it was 9am. That was when I felt that tap on my head and heard him. Felt him there in my apartment. At 10:30 my sister called to say they told her he had passed. I asked what time? She didn't know. So I called the hospice and the nurse on duty with him said, " Eight o'clock On the dot."
Which was 9am in New York City by me It's up to me now to appreciate this wonderful gift of life. And spend it well. Good night, Chuck. My baby brother. Like Lennon's song, "Beautiful, beautiful boy. ."
Until we meet again. Your loving sister, in NYC. That town you referred to as "that concrete jungle!"